Pearl and I having lunch last week with friends from my old job.
While I was in college, I dated a guy for about two seconds who asked me this question, "Are you going to school for apparel design because you want to do that as a job or because you want to learn how to make clothes for your children someday?" That question made me so upset. Yeah, ultra conservative-a wife's place is at home-guy, my parents and I are in student loan debt just so I can learn to make clothes for my kids. I seriously wanted to punch that guy.
I obviously think that was a terrible question to ask a woman, and I can confidently say there wasn't a woman in my program who was going to school for that reason. With that said, I am currently not working outside the home and I am caring for my daughter. It is a busy and rewarding job, but it is not the job that I spent years preparing for and was proud to tell people about when they asked what I did for work. My identity was so wrapped up in being a designer.
I plan to work as a commercial designer again (soon if the perfect job came along), and I'm also working hard to find freelance jobs, but that's not the point. The point is that I am a stay-at-home-mom right now. It isn't what I planned, but as soon as I had Pearl, it is what I wanted. I'm trying to get over feeling embarrassed because I don't have this super creative, cool sounding job anymore. I know it's a stupid thing to worry about, but I do so I thought I would share. I'm learning that my identity is not the same thing as my occupational title. There is so much more to me than that.
Have any of you other moms struggled with something similar?
P.S. Knowing how to make clothing items for Pearl has turned out to be a useful skill to have, but whatever, that question still sucked :)